Everton v Luton

So, after my sensational winning start at Brentford, I am confident that I shall be in charge of this thread until Christmas. Or until we play at Analfield more likely.

Anyways, I'm going up for this one and my missus will be making her Goodison debut. Not on the pitch, though I reckon she'd be a better option than Gueye in midfield as she is hard-working, vicious and like a terrier when it comes to harranging and snapping at the opposition (me). I shall introduce her to the joys of the Church before the game - though I believe they've stopped serving tea, the bastards. That's 777 probably, cutting back on costs immediately. I might even buy her a bovril. I'll be interested in her views on the women's bogs, as I haven't had the good fortune of getting inside them. I assume they're even worse than the men's bogs, which are the thing of nightmares.

I'm going for a 5-0 win. Beto, DCL hat trick, and one for my missus after she is introduced as a 90th minute sub.

Fuck Eric Morcambe, fuck the plucky Hatters, fuck everyone, COYB!

I will, unfortunately, miss this game but will try and keep an eye on my phone to follow the trashing/nervousness/humiliation (pick one).

My 9 year old daughter is also making her Goodison debut, so we'd better win or she'll go and support City or Arsenal.

Armchair wrote:My 9 year old daughter is also making her Goodison debut, so we'd better win or she'll go and support City or Arsenal.

Yes, the weird pressure of that first Everton game for your kids, I remember it well. The first game for my lads was an opening day 2-1 win over Wigan, 2007 I think. I don't think they would have immediately transferred their allegiance to Chelsea or Man U if we'd lost it (I mean, I wouldn't have allowed that to happen anyway) but the win did cap a perfect day in lovely weather and ensured beyond doubt that they were bitten by the bug. And we spoke to Andy Johnson before the game and he shook their hands and was a proper gent, which was nice.

We lost my first game, Coventry away in the 70's, but I remember not giving too much of a stuff about the loss because I was blown away by how many other Evertonians there were in the away end. This is a consequence of being the Only Blue in the Village, growing up in the south and being surrounded by plastic Kopites and Mancs. I was genuinely amazed that other Evertonians existed, that I wasn't on my own!  I was only 7 in fairness.

Your daughter will win this one for us, guaranteed. COYB.

Sir Hairy of winsville a la goat fame ... I think you have forgotten that our next match is against Villa in the piss pot on Wednesday.

Personally I think you should start that thread also (very quickly) & pray (being the strong Christian that you are) that the gods don't decide to fuck you over (like they have Rotts & me) for your discretion.

I expect da Judge to be active on this one but he was rather lame last time his services were called upon for blatant board mis-management when I was on hols... maybe he's retired now.

If we lose to either Villa or Luton then it is clearly your Hairyness' fault...

tut tut

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:Sir Hairy of winsville a la goat fame ... I think you have forgotten that our next match is against Villa in the piss pot on Wednesday.

Personally I think you should start that thread also (very quickly) & pray (being the strong Christian that you are) that the gods don't decide to fuck you over (like they have Rotts & me) for your discretion.

I expect da Judge to be active on this one but he was rather lame last time his services were called upon for blatant board mis-management when I was on hols... maybe he's retired now.

If we lose to either Villa or Luton then it is clearly your Hairyness' fault...

tut tut

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:Sir Hairy of winsville a la goat fame ... I think you have forgotten that our next match is against Villa in the piss pot on Wednesday.

Personally I think you should start that thread also (very quickly) & pray (being the strong Christian that you are) that the gods don't decide to fuck you over (like they have Rotts & me) for your discretion.

I expect da Judge to be active on this one but he was rather lame last time his services were called upon for blatant board mis-management when I was on hols... maybe he's retired now.

If we lose to either Villa or Luton then it is clearly your Hairyness' fault...

tut tut

Oh dear .... we have a snitch!

I have been rather busy today... just looked in my daily headlines ... my initial reaction is that Hairy has a medical defence of "premature e-speculation". It's also in his favour that he is very open as the impact its having on his relationship with his wife. It must be excruciating to have to explain why it's THIS match after all those years of waving him off at Euston - wondering whether he would ever get home from such perilous adventures.

So my Judgement - Jamie deduct 10 points from M4G for the flagrant flagging. Hairy it has to be said (notwithstanding all the above) DID INFRACT THE GOLDEN RULE of matches must be dealt in order. Hairy you punishment is 10 points (suspended if Luton lose - double if Luton win).

Da Judge wrote:

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:Sir Hairy of winsville a la goat fame ... I think you have forgotten that our next match is against Villa in the piss pot on Wednesday.

Personally I think you should start that thread also (very quickly) & pray (being the strong Christian that you are) that the gods don't decide to fuck you over (like they have Rotts & me) for your discretion.

I expect da Judge to be active on this one but he was rather lame last time his services were called upon for blatant board mis-management when I was on hols... maybe he's retired now.

If we lose to either Villa or Luton then it is clearly your Hairyness' fault...

tut tut

Oh dear .... we have a snitch!

I have been rather busy today... just looked in my daily headlines ... my initial reaction is that Hairy has a medical defence of "premature e-speculation". It's also in his favour that he is very open as the impact its having on his relationship with his wife. It must be excruciating to have to explain why it's THIS match after all those years of waving him off at Euston - wondering whether he would ever get home from such perilous adventures.

So my Judgement - Jamie deduct 10 points from M4G for the flagrant flagging. Hairy it has to be said (notwithstanding all the above) DID INFRACT THE GOLDEN RULE of matches must be dealt in order. Hairy you punishment is 10 points (suspended if Luton lose - double if Luton win).

yeah fuck you M4G!

Anway, deduct away as far as I'm concerned, I ain't in the Tipster milarkey

Hairy - don't forget there is a rail strike on Saturday, in case you were considering slumming it with the plebs on public transport.

Armchair wrote:Hairy - don't forget there is a rail strike on Saturday, in case you were considering slumming it with the plebs on public transport.

Thanks, yes I'm having to go up on Friday instead.

hairy cataract wrote:

Armchair wrote:Hairy - don't forget there is a rail strike on Saturday, in case you were considering slumming it with the plebs on public transport.

Thanks, yes I'm having to go up on Friday instead.  

Yeah likewise. Gives me the chance to go and see BMD before the match though, so works out ok (even if more expensive hotel-wise).

hairy cataract wrote:So, after my sensational winning start at Brentford, I am confident that I shall be in charge of this thread until Christmas.  Or until we play at Analfield more likely.

Anyways, I'm going up for this one and my missus will be making her Goodison debut.  Not on the pitch, though I reckon she'd be a better option than Gueye in midfield as she is hard-working, vicious and like a terrier when it comes to harranging and snapping at the opposition (me).  I shall introduce her to the joys of the Church before the game - though I believe they've stopped serving tea, the bastards.  That's 777 probably, cutting back on costs immediately.  I might even buy her a bovril.  I'll be interested in her views on the women's bogs, as I haven't had the good fortune of getting inside them.  I assume they're even worse than the men's bogs, which are the thing of nightmares.

I'm going for a 5-0 win.  Beto, DCL hat trick, and one for my missus after she is introduced as a 90th minute sub.  

Fuck Eric Morcambe, fuck the plucky Hatters, fuck everyone, COYB!

Hang on a minute Hairy balls,,you predicted a 4-0 to Brentford you cheeky little liar.

Any way we will beat Luton but it won’t be as easy as you think don’t expect a 5-0 drumming ,Sean Dyche will probably start with Beto although a safe bet would be to start with Calvert Lewin so we have back up for Dcl should he get Injured,
Hopefully Jack Harrison gets a run out against Aston Villa so he’ll be ready for Luton.

Going for a home win 2-0 DCL and Deucourie .UTFTs.

What a difference a week makes. I'm now looking forward to this and full of confidence. A dangerous feeling as an Evertonian.

Anyway, something like this will do

Once again I'll go for a very nervy 2-1 win.
If we can get 3 points here I think it will do the team & fans a world of good and raise confidence levels. We seem to have a bit more quality in depth now as well.

Be nice just to have a comfortable 3-0 win. Two in the first half and one on about 65 minutes just to settle the nerves. Potential difficulty with Luton is that we should have more of the ball so will need to break them down. Whereas the last two games we’ve been hitting teams on the counter. Hopefully Beto gets off the mark in the league and gives him the boost his performances have deserved.

Shitting myself today. Been such a fucking brilliant week and that evil little gremlin 'hope' has reared its ugly head again. Another win and the momentum continues but to lose to this shower of shite would be catastrophic and destroy any gained confidence. Luton are really bad. A draw would be a shit result but defeat is unthinkable.
Can't predict a win as don't want to jinx it, so a crappy 1-1 nervy draw, with a late Stuart penalty after a Limpar dive.
My first game at GP was against the Shite, way back in '69. Sandy fucking Brown!! But the atmosphere was astonishing and I was hooked for life, despite losing. At least I have experienced all the highs, my lad has never seen us win fuck all. Blames me for his therapy sessions!!! Kids are so ungrateful!!!

fucking hell

0-2

for what it's worth here is today's shower of shite being arse-fucked by Luton

It’s never easy, is it?

1-2 now ... or is it...

Goal stands --- DCL 1-2

Tonteau wrote:It’s never easy, is it?

it's the hope that kills us eh mate

Ffs, Everton. Didn’t watch it but sounded like a defensive disasterclass and more of the same with the shit finishing. First game I was actually feeling a bit hopeful about as well.

Absolute dog shit.