Ashley Cole

Made 4 Gwladys Thu 03 Feb 2022, 1:07 pm

Everton can confirm the appointment of Ashley Cole as First-Team Coach.

The former England defender joins from Chelsea’s academy and further strengthens boss Frank Lampard’s talented backroom team of assistant managers Joe Edwards and Duncan Ferguson, First-Team Coach Paul Clement, First Team Coach and Head of Performance Chris Jones and Goalkeeping Coach Alan Kelly.

Cole became a coach at Derby County after finishing his glittering playing career at the Rams, before following former Chelsea and England teammate Lampard to Stamford Bridge where he became an Academy Coach in October 2019.

In 2021, he took part in the launch of England Football Learning’s International Player to Coach (IP2C) programme, which works with former and current international players as they transition into coaching and management.

Last summer, Cole became England Under-21s assistant manager under Head Coach and former Everton midfielder Lee Carsley.

Lampard said: “I’m delighted to add Ashley into my backroom team. Everyone knows about his superb playing career and what he has achieved in the game.

“He is now a well-respected coach which has been recognised by his work with England Under-21s. He’ll bring a wealth of enthusiasm, game-play experience and is a very good young coach who adds strength to our coaching staff.”

Cole added: “I was thrilled when Frank asked me to join him at Everton. This is a brilliant opportunity with a fantastic club and I am coming here to work hard and try to help bring success to Everton.

“The chance to link up again with Frank was another huge draw. He is an excellent manager and leader. With the rest of the staff here, we have everything in place for what we want to achieve together.”

https://www.evertonfc.com/news/2470746/cole-joins-everton-coaching-team

hairy cataract Thu 03 Feb 2022, 3:01 pm

I think we've missed a trick here. We should have got Cheryl, his ex, instead. I mean we've got loads of hairy old men who used to be footballers, but Cheryl would bring something unique to the table. Her dance background would be good for our slightly leaden-footed defenders, and nobody can doubt her ambition and work ethic.

Goodison_Gringo Thu 03 Feb 2022, 11:14 pm

hairy cataract wrote:I think we've missed a trick here. We should have got Cheryl, his ex, instead. I mean we've got loads of hairy old men who used to be footballers, but Cheryl would bring something unique to the table. Her dance background would be good for our slightly leaden-footed defenders, and nobody can doubt her ambition and work ethic.

Something unique you say? Doesn't she have a tattooed arse? I'd say we have enough of those already.

Rotterdam 1985 Thu 03 Feb 2022, 11:41 pm

Goodison_Gringo wrote:
hairy cataract wrote:I think we've missed a trick here. We should have got Cheryl, his ex, instead. I mean we've got loads of hairy old men who used to be footballers, but Cheryl would bring something unique to the table. Her dance background would be good for our slightly leaden-footed defenders, and nobody can doubt her ambition and work ethic.

Something unique you say? Doesn't she have a tattooed arse? I'd say we have enough of those already.

Don't worry, it's a tattoo of a Mackem getting glassed with a broken Newcastle Brown bottle. Nothing particularly offensive.

I think Cheryl Cole is a good shout. Geordies, eh? Live and breathe football. I believe she was in the same youth team as Jack and Bobby Charlton. I agree though, it would have to be her or Ash, not both, on the basis that she absolutely hates his guts because he couldn't keep his cock in his trousers and wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire and wants him dead, man. DEAD. But that kind of conflict situation is absolutely on-brand for Everton right now, so, thinking on, I'm surprised they haven't done it.

Just like to go on the record and say that I don't like Ashley Cole one bit, clearly a scumbag with a face that always looks in need of a slap. He's that mate (I think everyone has one) who you would never leave alone in a pub with your own missus. "Just going for a piss Ash, errr, want to come with me? I want to ask you about, um, err, Bitcoin, yeah Bitcoin, that's it.")

So it is a bit of a Cockney takeover of Fortress Goodison and no mistake. Apparently they've already renamed the Spellow the Blind Beggar, Danny Dyer is in line for a hospitality gig "an this 'ere is the spot where Big Dunc twatted Scharner and Jimmy Bullard SHAT HIS FACKING PANTS" and they're going to bin off Z-Cars to be replaced with some tune or other that implores us to have a banana.

Made 4 Gwladys Mon 23 Jan 2023, 4:11 pm

i guess he's gone too ?

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