Everton v Brighton

Started so well. Great atmosphere, amazing array of flags and banners - my favourite being the “There are places I’ll remember” one before the game - fair brought a tear to my eye - and we kicked off positively with lots of energy, and then…. Well you know the rest.

Only positive was Tim number 42 who looks an absolute bargain.

Other than that, BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

I was one of only about 63 people who stayed till the end, so that’s something to tell the grandkids I suppose

Brighton are no semi-professionals, they are legit and it'll be interesting to see how their season plays out. Having said that, dear me, we really needed to score with one of the chances in the first 10-15 minutes.

Against Spurs, I'd drop Keane for O'Brien and Gana for Ndiaye. Hopefully that'll help the backline and the middle of the park some. Hoping that Coleman is fit to play RB because I sure don't want Holgate to start. What exactly does Holgate offer? Well, apart from that wonderful push of Firmino into the stands. I'll always love that, but that's one of very few instances he's done much to bring a smile to my (anyone's?) face.

hairy cataract wrote:Started so well. Great atmosphere, amazing array of flags and banners - my favourite being the “There are places I’ll remember” one before the game - fair brought a tear to my eye - and we kicked off positively with lots of energy, and then…. Well you know the rest.

Only positive was Tim number 42 who looks an absolute bargain.

Other than that, BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

I was one of only about 63 people who stayed till the end, so that’s something to tell the grandkids I suppose

A rather incongruous juxtaposition, a song that great aligned to a team this bad. That's not a criticism of the banner, obviously. Well done for getting through the whole show, going back to keep wicket for Croydon Gentlemen, marrying Doris, etc.

It's a bit early to be totally fucked off with Dyche but I believe that in his post-match waffle today he talked about - and I paraphrase somewhat - "bringing players in this summer to make us better, but they lack Premier League experience."

OK. So Lindstrom and O'Brien still lack PL experience because they didn't get a sniff of the turf today. With 5 minutes left he brought on Holgate rather than O'Brien. Dyche only made three subs, in a game that was gone as soon as that fuckwit Young got sent off at 2-0 down with 35 minutes left to play. When exactly will these lads get PL experience? Isn't ability (i.e. O'Brien being clearly better than Keane and Holgate) more important than experience? Isn't now, early on, the time to give them that experience, rather than three or six months into the season when we're in the shit? Build the team now that we know we'll need later in the season you cunt! Sorry but I genuinely don't understand the logic; someone educate me please.

Speaking of experience - Ashley fucking Young became the oldest player ever to be sent off in the PL today. No pace, and a red card on legs, but plenty of experience, eh? Lovely. Imagine the shit we'd be in without Ashley Young's PL experience.

On a beach in Greece a week or two ago, while supping cold beers and enjoying the last few salad days of Everton not fucking our weekends up, me and my eldest prophesised the starting line up for the Brighton game. We agreed, all the new signings will be on the bench. Dyche is so fucking predictable and reactionary sometimes. Iroegbunam only started because Garner's crocked. Nice to hear that he did well.

Anyway, strap yerselves in. I recall Dyche's Burnley having some absolutely shocking starts to the season. Spurs away up next, Villa away looming. I actually felt quite optimistic pre-season, for the first time in a few years, extolling Dyche's virtues to anyone who would listen. But let's echo the Beatles again - "love has a nasty habit of disappearing overnight."

Optimistic Rotts is screaming "it's only one game!!!" in a corner of my brain but I've just given Optimistic Rotts a sharp dig in the kidneys and told him to shut the fuck up while I drown my sorrows in low quality red wine while listening to The Verve and Leonard Cohen.

I suspect that in a couple of months' time I'll be back to saying that we're lucky to have Dyche, he'll probably straighten us out. But what are the odds that we'll also be saying "imagine where we'd be if we'd started the season with O'Brien, Ndiaye and Lindstrom in the team"? I don't understand why it has to be this way. Where I work, all the experienced people are fucking useless and stink of piss, time servers waiting for their pension and their life of Warner Travel coach trips to the Pyrenees and the Moselle Valley. Experience is overrated.

I ain't watching Match of the Day, obviously.

Exactly. It’s like first day of term and all the other kids have got their shiny new pens and geometry cases on their desks and we’ve got last year’s snapped off ruler and a pencil in a an old carrier bag.

Like you, I just knew we’d start with as close as Dyche could get to last season’s team. Even if we’d have signed Mbappe he’d have been on the bench because Doucouré has earned his place in the team or some such shite.

All he understand is relegation battles and that’s what he sets up for. I really hoped that this season we might play a bit of progressive football with the new signings we’ve made. Shows what a naive fool I am.

I think we might have been a bit too optimistic about our signings.
I thought Tim looked a good buy, but there were a few errors in places you don't want them. He'll get there though. A good £9M spent there.
Our new 10 didn't get enough for us to know if he's any good, but I'l play him just cause we need guile, and it's sadly missing still.
I had a bad feeling about he game, as soon as our back 4 was announced. Somehow I must have been feeling that out of nowhere, were were going to field a stronger back line. A had another pint of Guinness in the Top House as a result.
Anyway, next week Son should give us a good barometer for our defensive needs.
Should we have kept Godfrey and dumped Young, even it cost us £10M ?

I know it's only the first game of the season, so hopefully we'll play some good football and win some games, BUT I have watched bits and pieces of the Chelsea - Man City game today and both team's contrast to how we played with long balls is simply staggering. Both Chelsea and man City are PLAYING the ball through the midfield while we just did the long ball to Harrison over and over with Doucoure running offside over and over. If it weren't so bad what we did compared to what I'm currently watching between Chelsea and Man City, one could laugh.

Tonteau wrote:

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:Everton 0-1 Brighton

Hang on, just on that Everton no-penalty...

In turns out there was a technical issue with the VAR screen so referee Simon Hooper wasn't able to see any replays. He overturned his decision on VAR's advice.

This is objectively bullshit. Surely this completely undermines the ref.

this was totally ridiculous... just imagine the uproar if that happened to City, Manure or the shite.. because it's Everton fuck all is said

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:I know it's only the first game of the season, so hopefully we'll play some good football and win some games, BUT I have watched bits and pieces of the Chelsea - Man City game today and both team's contrast to how we played with long balls is simply staggering. Both Chelsea and man City are PLAYING the ball through the midfield while we just did the long ball to Harrison over and over with Doucoure running offside over and over. If it weren't so bad what we did compared to what I'm currently watching between Chelsea and Man City, one could laugh.

To be honest, even watching Brighton was a contrast - a strong number nine with good ball skills, flanked by nippy wingers cutting in alongside him to cause mayhem in our clunking defence, fast breaks from defence, neat triangles, after the first 20 minutes they looked much classier than us.  And, at first, I thought their defence looked a bit suspect, but the longer the game went on, the more solid and untroubled they looked.

I think Brighton will do well this season, but we are in for another slog against relegation, with very few bits of good football to entertain us.  Our only hope is that three teams start really fucking badly and Dyche feels comfortable enough to start with all of our new signings, plus Harrison Armstrong occasionally and maybe even Roman Dixon.  We can't carry on like this, playing depressing, slow football with the sole aim of staying up.  Or anyway, if we do, I'm going to start watching lower league football or something.  This is soulless, joyless, unambitious tripe.

I’m disappointed but not disheartened. It’s only one game and seems like a couple of players made howlers and Brighton capitalised. Dyche has built a career on not letting a dreadful performance affect him/the team. We had some stinkers last year. Did hope we’d start better though, a narrow loss you can say “bad day at the office” or  “if Beto had taken that chance”…  getting gubbed 3-0 at home is less easy to take.

Right back is a worry. As long as we have young Dyche will use him. Seamus (if fit) will be ok for the main but Paterson seems to be made of china.

hairy cataract wrote:

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:I know it's only the first game of the season, so hopefully we'll play some good football and win some games, BUT I have watched bits and pieces of the Chelsea - Man City game today and both team's contrast to how we played with long balls is simply staggering. Both Chelsea and man City are PLAYING the ball through the midfield while we just did the long ball to Harrison over and over with Doucoure running offside over and over. If it weren't so bad what we did compared to what I'm currently watching between Chelsea and Man City, one could laugh.

To be honest, even watching Brighton was a contrast - a strong number nine with good ball skills, flanked by nippy wingers cutting in alongside him to cause mayhem in our clunking defence, fast breaks from defence, neat triangles, after the first 20 minutes they looked much classier than us.  And, at first, I thought their defence looked a bit suspect, but the longer the game went on, the more solid and untroubled they looked.

I think Brighton will do well this season, but we are in for another slog against relegation, with very few bits of good football to entertain us.  Our only hope is that three teams start really fucking badly and Dyche feels comfortable enough to start with all of our new signings, plus Harrison Armstrong occasionally and maybe even Roman Dixon.  We can't carry on like this, playing depressing, slow football with the sole aim of staying up.  Or anyway, if we do, I'm going to start watching lower league football or something.  This is soulless, joyless, unambitious tripe.

Yep, no doubt they were way better than us. Refer to my match post towards the top of page 2 in this thread, where based on the quality of play I thought we might have been playing Real Madrid.

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:Former Premier League referee Dermot Gallagher believes the VAR was correct to overturn the penalty awarded to Everton on Saturday against Brighton.
'I thought it was a really, really good intervention by the VAR,' he said on Ref Watch on Monday morning. 'Calvert-Lewin actually stands on Dunk's foot there and that's what knocks him off balance. I don't think it's a foul. The VAR quite rightly alerted the referee.'


Sue Smith and Stephen Warnock differed in their view though, with both suggesting it was a penalty.
'If Calvert-Lewin takes a step and Dunk is stationary and he stands on his foot, Calvert-Lewin doesn't go down,' said Warnock. 'The reason he goes down is that momentum of Dunk's leg moving. When you put your leg on a moving object you're going to move with it. I did think it was a penalty.'

For what it's worth, I've watched a slo-mo of it about 35 times and I'm still not sure if it was a pen or not. I do have a bit of an issue with the rules being changed apparently on a whim to allow VAR to overrule the on-field ref when the replay isn't available to the on-field ref. If they have the power to do that, let's stop the ridiculous shenanigans of the on-field ref going over to the monitor - let the VAR ref make the call.

I've never known this scenario to play out before. Why are we subject to so many controversial "firsts"?

christ... Tarky is a doubt now for the Spuds game & Branth out.... could be Keane & Holgate at CB   ... since O'Brien doesn't have enough prem experience 

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:christ... Tarky is a doubt now for the Spuds game & Branth out.... could be Keane & Holgate at CB   ... since O'Brien doesn't have enough prem experience 

...and not a fit right back in the house!!! All looking SNAFU.

Holgate right back, O'Brien and Keane in the middle, Myko at left back
Tim, Gana, Duke, McNeil, Harrison in the middle
DCL up front.

10 back, DCL on his own up front, and we should keep Spurs down to seven or eight I reckon.