Arsenal v Everton

Arsenal v Everton Sunday 19th May 24 K/O 16.00 pm at the Emirates Stadium.

Arsenal hoping Man City slip up against West Ham on Sunday the 19th May 24,to win the Premier League title
No body has given Everton the script so anything could happen, 

Putting my neck on the chopping board going for a 0 v 0 draw. UTFTs

City lose & Arse draw with us.... would be hilarious 


Can't really see anything but both Arse & Citeh winning though

I think Arsenal will beat us pretty comfortably since we always seem to struggle against them.

My prediction: West Ham will take a shock early lead against City. Pep will run around like a Duracell rabbit for the rest of the first half until his batteries die. He will query every throw-in and offside decision with the fourth official, and will eventually slink into his chair with that passive aggressive smile that he always pulls off when he thinks the world is against him. Meanwhile, we will park the bus at the Emirates and, despite being half on the beach, we'll get enough bodies in the way of Odegaard's five efforts from outside the box to prevent them from scoring first half.

City will then score twice in the opening five minutes of the second half, like they always do. Pep is suddenly the 4th official's best friend, smiling away and patting him on the back every 5 minutes. They may even arrange to do dinner later. The City Panzer will then grind West Ham into the dust and they'll end up winning 5-1.

As soon as City are three goals clear, Arsenal will stop shitting themselves and start to play with a bit of freedom and control. They'll end up putting three past Pickford, who appears to be wearing a sombrero in goal, surely a PL first. Tarkowski asks the ref to keep the injury time to an absolute minimum because he's got to catch a flight to Malaga straight after the game and Jet 2 are fuckers, they won't let you through the gate if you're a minute late.

Over at Anfield, the RS will YNWA themselves into a demented mania. Until half time, after which they'll start singing songs about Arne Slot. The Shite will be 2-0 up, Salah with both goals. They'll then get a pen, only for Salah to be robbed of his hat-trick by being subbed off before he can take it in one final passive aggressive act from the Toothy One. He'll then say in the post-match presser that he and Salah are fine, there is no problem. Salah will call him a cunt in his presser and drop hints to the police about digging up his patio.

I've just remembered the first question that the interviewer asked Rodri after their win at Spurs. Now bearing in mind it was a win that took them two points clear at the top with one home game to go..."Rodri, just how important was that win?" I genuinely laughed.

Anyway, farewell, points deduction season. You will not be missed.

City will lose, we'll bore Arsenal into a 0-0 and everyone will blame us for ruining football.

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:My prediction: West Ham will take a shock early lead against City. Pep will run around like a Duracell rabbit for the rest of the first half until his batteries die. He will query every throw-in and offside decision with the fourth official, and will eventually slink into his chair with that passive aggressive smile that he always pulls off when he thinks the world is against him. Meanwhile, we will park the bus at the Emirates and, despite being half on the beach, we'll get enough bodies in the way of Odegaard's five efforts from outside the box to prevent them from scoring first half.

City will then score twice in the opening five minutes of the second half, like they always do. Pep is suddenly the 4th official's best friend, smiling away and patting him on the back every 5 minutes. They may even arrange to do dinner later. The City Panzer will then grind West Ham into the dust and they'll end up winning 5-1.

As soon as City are three goals clear, Arsenal will stop shitting themselves and start to play with a bit of freedom and control. They'll end up putting three past Pickford, who appears to be wearing a sombrero in goal, surely a PL first. Tarkowski asks the ref to keep the injury time to an absolute minimum because he's got to catch a flight to Malaga straight after the game and Jet 2 are fuckers, they won't let you through the gate if you're a minute late.

Over at Anfield, the RS will YNWA themselves into a demented mania. Until half time, after which they'll start singing songs about Arne Slot. The Shite will be 2-0 up, Salah with both goals. They'll then get a pen, only for Salah to be robbed of his hat-trick by being subbed off before he can take it in one final passive aggressive act from the Toothy One. He'll then say in the post-match presser that he and Salah are fine, there is no problem. Salah will call him a cunt in his presser and drop hints to the police about digging up his patio.

I've just remembered the first question that the interviewer asked Rodri after their win at Spurs. Now bearing in mind it was a win that took them two points clear at the top with one home game to go..."Rodri, just how important was that win?" I genuinely laughed.

Anyway, farewell, points deduction season. You will not be missed.

Well written Rotts. I especially liked the reference "The Toothy One".

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:My prediction: West Ham will take a shock early lead against City. Pep will run around like a Duracell rabbit for the rest of the first half until his batteries die. He will query every throw-in and offside decision with the fourth official, and will eventually slink into his chair with that passive aggressive smile that he always pulls off when he thinks the world is against him. Meanwhile, we will park the bus at the Emirates and, despite being half on the beach, we'll get enough bodies in the way of Odegaard's five efforts from outside the box to prevent them from scoring first half.

City will then score twice in the opening five minutes of the second half, like they always do. Pep is suddenly the 4th official's best friend, smiling away and patting him on the back every 5 minutes. They may even arrange to do dinner later. The City Panzer will then grind West Ham into the dust and they'll end up winning 5-1.

As soon as City are three goals clear, Arsenal will stop shitting themselves and start to play with a bit of freedom and control. They'll end up putting three past Pickford, who appears to be wearing a sombrero in goal, surely a PL first. Tarkowski asks the ref to keep the injury time to an absolute minimum because he's got to catch a flight to Malaga straight after the game and Jet 2 are fuckers, they won't let you through the gate if you're a minute late.

Over at Anfield, the RS will YNWA themselves into a demented mania. Until half time, after which they'll start singing songs about Arne Slot. The Shite will be 2-0 up, Salah with both goals. They'll then get a pen, only for Salah to be robbed of his hat-trick by being subbed off before he can take it in one final passive aggressive act from the Toothy One. He'll then say in the post-match presser that he and Salah are fine, there is no problem. Salah will call him a cunt in his presser and drop hints to the police about digging up his patio.

I've just remembered the first question that the interviewer asked Rodri after their win at Spurs. Now bearing in mind it was a win that took them two points clear at the top with one home game to go..."Rodri, just how important was that win?" I genuinely laughed.

Anyway, farewell, points deduction season. You will not be missed.

Well written Rotts. I especially liked the reference "The Toothy One".

Yeah, and I reckon you won't be far wrong on any of it.

Funny thing is that it's ended up being yet another season with us being happier then the RS fans at the end. We avoided relegation with something to spare, despite being fucked over twice by the PL, which was the very best we could have hoped for - in fact, it probably exceeded our wildest expectations.

On the other side, the Shite have massively underachieved - despite the retrospective nonsense some of the kloppites are coming out with about "we never expected to win anything this time - and Klopp has ended up with fuck all to play for on his retirement from Shiteland PLC, when he would have expected to finish off with at least a big cup final and a parade.

Entschuldigung, keine Parade für Sie, Herr Fotze

I reckon the hammers will surprise Man City and beat them to nil but with the title wide open before them, Arsenal will crumble in the face of Dyche’s mighty Toffees. In the bitter inquest that follows in north London, the blame will be pointed at one man, and one man only: SEFTON. A man on such a hot streak that the toffees literally cannot lose when he’s at the helm. We need him on the match thread through the whole of preseason and from game one next season, I’ll be getting my £10 on the toffees doing a Leicester.

Tonteau wrote:I reckon the hammers will surprise Man City and beat them to nil but with the title wide open before them, Arsenal will crumble in the face of Dyche’s mighty Toffees. In the bitter inquest that follows in north London, the blame will be pointed at one man, and one man only: SEFTON. A man on such a hot streak that the toffees literally cannot lose when he’s at the helm. We need him on the match thread through the whole of preseason and from game one next season, I’ll be getting my £10 on the toffees doing a Leicester.

Sef's run of form is the one thing that makes me think this day won't go the way people think. He's been unstoppable.

Next season we need Sef on every game. If he claims that "work is getting in the way of me posting on here" then I'm finding out where he works and phoning them to tell them he's had his hands in the till. And also strangles kittens for fun. He'll get sacked, which may cause him a bit of personal disappointment but I'm thinking bigger picture here.

hairy cataract wrote:

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:My prediction: West Ham will take a shock early lead against City. Pep will run around like a Duracell rabbit for the rest of the first half until his batteries die. He will query every throw-in and offside decision with the fourth official, and will eventually slink into his chair with that passive aggressive smile that he always pulls off when he thinks the world is against him. Meanwhile, we will park the bus at the Emirates and, despite being half on the beach, we'll get enough bodies in the way of Odegaard's five efforts from outside the box to prevent them from scoring first half.

City will then score twice in the opening five minutes of the second half, like they always do. Pep is suddenly the 4th official's best friend, smiling away and patting him on the back every 5 minutes. They may even arrange to do dinner later. The City Panzer will then grind West Ham into the dust and they'll end up winning 5-1.

As soon as City are three goals clear, Arsenal will stop shitting themselves and start to play with a bit of freedom and control. They'll end up putting three past Pickford, who appears to be wearing a sombrero in goal, surely a PL first. Tarkowski asks the ref to keep the injury time to an absolute minimum because he's got to catch a flight to Malaga straight after the game and Jet 2 are fuckers, they won't let you through the gate if you're a minute late.

Over at Anfield, the RS will YNWA themselves into a demented mania. Until half time, after which they'll start singing songs about Arne Slot. The Shite will be 2-0 up, Salah with both goals. They'll then get a pen, only for Salah to be robbed of his hat-trick by being subbed off before he can take it in one final passive aggressive act from the Toothy One. He'll then say in the post-match presser that he and Salah are fine, there is no problem. Salah will call him a cunt in his presser and drop hints to the police about digging up his patio.

I've just remembered the first question that the interviewer asked Rodri after their win at Spurs. Now bearing in mind it was a win that took them two points clear at the top with one home game to go..."Rodri, just how important was that win?" I genuinely laughed.

Anyway, farewell, points deduction season. You will not be missed.

Well written Rotts. I especially liked the reference "The Toothy One".

Yeah, and I reckon you won't be far wrong on any of it.

Funny thing is that it's ended up being yet another season with us being happier then the RS fans at the end.  We avoided relegation with something to spare, despite being fucked over twice by the PL, which was the very best we could have hoped for - in fact, it probably exceeded our wildest expectations.

On the other side, the Shite have massively underachieved - despite the retrospective nonsense some of the kloppites are coming out with about "we never expected to win anything this time - and Klopp has ended up with fuck all to play for on his retirement from Shiteland PLC, when he would have expected to finish off with at least a big cup final and a parade.  

Entschuldigung, keine Parade für Sie, Herr Fotze

Yep. And this all feeds into my theory of how they will never find true happiness again, because true happiness for the RS is to be the best team that ever existed with the best record in all the world. They've won 19 domestic titles but if they find out that Sporting Ganja have won the Jamaican league 20 times, they hate them. They're utterly, irrationally obsessed by numbers. Whereas we just want a couple of free transfers in the summer who will stay fit and help us to 12th, and maybe find an owner who isn't a money laundering fotze (I translated that word and have now memory-banked it for some German colleagues I don't like.)

They must hate Paisley, deep down. He's done this to them. Let's put it this way - we can look back on our European glory as a somewhat unexpected but still wonderful one-night stand. For them, it's sitting in their bedsit in a string vest and stained underpants with a roll-up on the go looking at photos that bring back memories of when they somehow dated a supermodel for several years when they were younger and better-looking. After a while, they put the photos down and log into Twitter (@DaveLFC19&6) and rant at strangers about how great they are and how it all means more to them. Their Twitter profile pick is probably a headshot from their supermodel-dating days. Or it's a picture of Arne Slot (yep, the funeral is tomorrow, but they've moved on already.)

To take this analogy further, the Klopp era is when they cleaned themselves up, lost a bit of weight, bought a new suit and maybe even a fresh pair of undercrackers. Back on the market, baby. And yeah, they got a bit of eye contact from lookers at the bar, but still ended up going home alone every night to have a wank. I think they might get the string vest back out and let themselves go again now. Maybe Klopp is the end; he took them close to their promised land, but maybe they'll now realise that you can't turn back time, that they can't have what they want.

Maybe we've got it right, it's easier this way. Don't get me wrong, we also look back wistfully at better days, but we are not held hostage emotionally by our history to anything like the same degree - we're more realistic, we just want to be respectable and win a pot every 6 or 7 years. That is why, despite their Carabao glory this season, I would genuinely hate to be one of them. They mock others for their relative lack of success but it's driven by their own deep-rooted frustration. It's quite funny actually.

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:

Tonteau wrote:I reckon the hammers will surprise Man City and beat them to nil but with the title wide open before them, Arsenal will crumble in the face of Dyche’s mighty Toffees. In the bitter inquest that follows in north London, the blame will be pointed at one man, and one man only: SEFTON. A man on such a hot streak that the toffees literally cannot lose when he’s at the helm. We need him on the match thread through the whole of preseason and from game one next season, I’ll be getting my £10 on the toffees doing a Leicester.

Sef's run of form is the one thing that makes me think this day won't go the way people think. He's been unstoppable.

Next season we need Sef on every game. If he claims that "work is getting in the way of me posting on here" then I'm finding out where he works and phoning them to tell them he's had his hands in the till. And also strangles kittens for fun. He'll get sacked, which may cause him a bit of personal disappointment but I'm thinking bigger picture here.

Haha I work at Heathrow mate and I have two cats so killing eve won’t help either as miss Coma is an Evertonian anyways I mentioned on here I just wanted premiership survival and a decent takeover! So far we are on course hoping MSP take us over for a season is what I have heard ,at least would stave off from administration.going to try make a promise not to finish bottom of the the predictions league next season .

Here’s to us getting something out of Sundays game at the Emirates.UTFTs 

SEFTON wrote:

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:

Tonteau wrote:I reckon the hammers will surprise Man City and beat them to nil but with the title wide open before them, Arsenal will crumble in the face of Dyche’s mighty Toffees. In the bitter inquest that follows in north London, the blame will be pointed at one man, and one man only: SEFTON. A man on such a hot streak that the toffees literally cannot lose when he’s at the helm. We need him on the match thread through the whole of preseason and from game one next season, I’ll be getting my £10 on the toffees doing a Leicester.

Sef's run of form is the one thing that makes me think this day won't go the way people think. He's been unstoppable.

Next season we need Sef on every game. If he claims that "work is getting in the way of me posting on here" then I'm finding out where he works and phoning them to tell them he's had his hands in the till. And also strangles kittens for fun. He'll get sacked, which may cause him a bit of personal disappointment but I'm thinking bigger picture here.

Haha I work at Heathrow mate and I have two cats so killing eve won’t help either as miss Coma is an Evertonian anyways I mentioned on here I just wanted premiership survival and a decent takeover! So far we are on course hoping MSP take us over for a season is what I have heard ,at least would stave off from administration.going to try make a promise not to finish bottom of the the predictions league next season .

Here’s to us getting something out of Sundays game at the Emirates.UTFTs 

Heathrow? OK, thanks mate. And about your line manager, do you have any amusing nicknames for him that you could share here? Or real names even? Does he have one of those amusing real names like Phil McCavity or John Dungheap? If so, do you have a direct line telephone number for him so that I can call him up and say his name and then laugh?

Final question - one of my lad's mates is interested in getting into your line of work and would like to speak to HR about any potential openings. Can you give me the number for your HR department please? No not the general HR team but the HR team that specifically deals with your area Sef. Just so that I can avoid having to go through that awful call routing system they're bound to have. You know what I mean - "for payroll enquiries, press 1; for kitten abuse, press 2; for health and wellbeing support, press 3" etc. Thanks mate, appreciate it.

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:

hairy cataract wrote:

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:My prediction: West Ham will take a shock early lead against City. Pep will run around like a Duracell rabbit for the rest of the first half until his batteries die. He will query every throw-in and offside decision with the fourth official, and will eventually slink into his chair with that passive aggressive smile that he always pulls off when he thinks the world is against him. Meanwhile, we will park the bus at the Emirates and, despite being half on the beach, we'll get enough bodies in the way of Odegaard's five efforts from outside the box to prevent them from scoring first half.

City will then score twice in the opening five minutes of the second half, like they always do. Pep is suddenly the 4th official's best friend, smiling away and patting him on the back every 5 minutes. They may even arrange to do dinner later. The City Panzer will then grind West Ham into the dust and they'll end up winning 5-1.

As soon as City are three goals clear, Arsenal will stop shitting themselves and start to play with a bit of freedom and control. They'll end up putting three past Pickford, who appears to be wearing a sombrero in goal, surely a PL first. Tarkowski asks the ref to keep the injury time to an absolute minimum because he's got to catch a flight to Malaga straight after the game and Jet 2 are fuckers, they won't let you through the gate if you're a minute late.

Over at Anfield, the RS will YNWA themselves into a demented mania. Until half time, after which they'll start singing songs about Arne Slot. The Shite will be 2-0 up, Salah with both goals. They'll then get a pen, only for Salah to be robbed of his hat-trick by being subbed off before he can take it in one final passive aggressive act from the Toothy One. He'll then say in the post-match presser that he and Salah are fine, there is no problem. Salah will call him a cunt in his presser and drop hints to the police about digging up his patio.

I've just remembered the first question that the interviewer asked Rodri after their win at Spurs. Now bearing in mind it was a win that took them two points clear at the top with one home game to go..."Rodri, just how important was that win?" I genuinely laughed.

Anyway, farewell, points deduction season. You will not be missed.

Well written Rotts. I especially liked the reference "The Toothy One".

Yeah, and I reckon you won't be far wrong on any of it.

Funny thing is that it's ended up being yet another season with us being happier then the RS fans at the end.  We avoided relegation with something to spare, despite being fucked over twice by the PL, which was the very best we could have hoped for - in fact, it probably exceeded our wildest expectations.

On the other side, the Shite have massively underachieved - despite the retrospective nonsense some of the kloppites are coming out with about "we never expected to win anything this time - and Klopp has ended up with fuck all to play for on his retirement from Shiteland PLC, when he would have expected to finish off with at least a big cup final and a parade.  

Entschuldigung, keine Parade für Sie, Herr Fotze

Yep. And this all feeds into my theory of how they will never find true happiness again, because true happiness for the RS is to be the best team that ever existed with the best record in all the world. They've won 19 domestic titles but if they find out that Sporting Ganja have won the Jamaican league 20 times, they hate them. They're utterly, irrationally obsessed by numbers. Whereas we just want a couple of free transfers in the summer who will stay fit and help us to 12th, and maybe find an owner who isn't a money laundering fotze (I translated that word and have now memory-banked it for some German colleagues I don't like.)

They must hate Paisley, deep down. He's done this to them. Let's put it this way - we can look back on our European glory as a somewhat unexpected but still wonderful one-night stand. For them, it's sitting in their bedsit in a string vest and stained underpants with a roll-up on the go looking at photos that bring back memories of when they somehow dated a supermodel for several years when they were younger and better-looking. After a while, they put the photos down and log into Twitter (@DaveLFC19&6) and rant at strangers about how great they are and how it all means more to them. Their Twitter profile pick is probably a headshot from their supermodel-dating days. Or it's a picture of Arne Slot (yep, the funeral is tomorrow, but they've moved on already.)

To take this analogy further, the Klopp era is when they cleaned themselves up, lost a bit of weight, bought a new suit and maybe even a fresh pair of undercrackers. Back on the market, baby. And yeah, they got a bit of eye contact from lookers at the bar, but still ended up going home alone every night to have a wank. I think they might get the string vest back out and let themselves go again now. Maybe Klopp is the end; he took them close to their promised land, but maybe they'll now realise that you can't turn back time, that they can't have what they want.

Maybe we've got it right, it's easier this way. Don't get me wrong, we also look back wistfully at better days, but we are not held hostage emotionally by our history to anything like the same degree - we're more realistic, we just want to be respectable and win a pot every 6 or 7 years. That is why, despite their Carabao glory this season, I would genuinely hate to be one of them. They mock others for their relative lack of success but it's driven by their own deep-rooted frustration. It's quite funny actually.

That's good Rotts. In fact, I feel like one of those RS in the string vest. My posts can never match yours. Maybe they could once, but you're like the Man City of forum posters, the Pep of the keyboard. I remember when I would get laughs galore and easily qualify for the end of season awards on here, but now, like Klopp, I realise that while you're around I can only ever be second best. And I'm angry. My teeth hurt, like Klopp's must. Fuck you Rotts, fuck your posts.

I feel there are only two options available to me. I can either retire from the game, or I can hunt you down and kill you. I will be the Baby Reindeer of the forum. Uh, no that's not right, Baby Reindeer was the hunted. I'll be that fat bird.

hairy cataract wrote:

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:

hairy cataract wrote:

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:My prediction: West Ham will take a shock early lead against City. Pep will run around like a Duracell rabbit for the rest of the first half until his batteries die. He will query every throw-in and offside decision with the fourth official, and will eventually slink into his chair with that passive aggressive smile that he always pulls off when he thinks the world is against him. Meanwhile, we will park the bus at the Emirates and, despite being half on the beach, we'll get enough bodies in the way of Odegaard's five efforts from outside the box to prevent them from scoring first half.

City will then score twice in the opening five minutes of the second half, like they always do. Pep is suddenly the 4th official's best friend, smiling away and patting him on the back every 5 minutes. They may even arrange to do dinner later. The City Panzer will then grind West Ham into the dust and they'll end up winning 5-1.

As soon as City are three goals clear, Arsenal will stop shitting themselves and start to play with a bit of freedom and control. They'll end up putting three past Pickford, who appears to be wearing a sombrero in goal, surely a PL first. Tarkowski asks the ref to keep the injury time to an absolute minimum because he's got to catch a flight to Malaga straight after the game and Jet 2 are fuckers, they won't let you through the gate if you're a minute late.

Over at Anfield, the RS will YNWA themselves into a demented mania. Until half time, after which they'll start singing songs about Arne Slot. The Shite will be 2-0 up, Salah with both goals. They'll then get a pen, only for Salah to be robbed of his hat-trick by being subbed off before he can take it in one final passive aggressive act from the Toothy One. He'll then say in the post-match presser that he and Salah are fine, there is no problem. Salah will call him a cunt in his presser and drop hints to the police about digging up his patio.

I've just remembered the first question that the interviewer asked Rodri after their win at Spurs. Now bearing in mind it was a win that took them two points clear at the top with one home game to go..."Rodri, just how important was that win?" I genuinely laughed.

Anyway, farewell, points deduction season. You will not be missed.

Well written Rotts. I especially liked the reference "The Toothy One".

Yeah, and I reckon you won't be far wrong on any of it.

Funny thing is that it's ended up being yet another season with us being happier then the RS fans at the end.  We avoided relegation with something to spare, despite being fucked over twice by the PL, which was the very best we could have hoped for - in fact, it probably exceeded our wildest expectations.

On the other side, the Shite have massively underachieved - despite the retrospective nonsense some of the kloppites are coming out with about "we never expected to win anything this time - and Klopp has ended up with fuck all to play for on his retirement from Shiteland PLC, when he would have expected to finish off with at least a big cup final and a parade.  

Entschuldigung, keine Parade für Sie, Herr Fotze

Yep. And this all feeds into my theory of how they will never find true happiness again, because true happiness for the RS is to be the best team that ever existed with the best record in all the world. They've won 19 domestic titles but if they find out that Sporting Ganja have won the Jamaican league 20 times, they hate them. They're utterly, irrationally obsessed by numbers. Whereas we just want a couple of free transfers in the summer who will stay fit and help us to 12th, and maybe find an owner who isn't a money laundering fotze (I translated that word and have now memory-banked it for some German colleagues I don't like.)

They must hate Paisley, deep down. He's done this to them. Let's put it this way - we can look back on our European glory as a somewhat unexpected but still wonderful one-night stand. For them, it's sitting in their bedsit in a string vest and stained underpants with a roll-up on the go looking at photos that bring back memories of when they somehow dated a supermodel for several years when they were younger and better-looking. After a while, they put the photos down and log into Twitter (@DaveLFC19&6) and rant at strangers about how great they are and how it all means more to them. Their Twitter profile pick is probably a headshot from their supermodel-dating days. Or it's a picture of Arne Slot (yep, the funeral is tomorrow, but they've moved on already.)

To take this analogy further, the Klopp era is when they cleaned themselves up, lost a bit of weight, bought a new suit and maybe even a fresh pair of undercrackers. Back on the market, baby. And yeah, they got a bit of eye contact from lookers at the bar, but still ended up going home alone every night to have a wank. I think they might get the string vest back out and let themselves go again now. Maybe Klopp is the end; he took them close to their promised land, but maybe they'll now realise that you can't turn back time, that they can't have what they want.

Maybe we've got it right, it's easier this way. Don't get me wrong, we also look back wistfully at better days, but we are not held hostage emotionally by our history to anything like the same degree - we're more realistic, we just want to be respectable and win a pot every 6 or 7 years. That is why, despite their Carabao glory this season, I would genuinely hate to be one of them. They mock others for their relative lack of success but it's driven by their own deep-rooted frustration. It's quite funny actually.

That's good Rotts.  In fact, I feel like one of those RS in the string vest.  My posts can never match yours.  Maybe they could once, but you're like the Man City of forum posters, the Pep of the keyboard.  I remember when I would get laughs galore and easily qualify for the end of season awards on here, but now, like Klopp, I realise that while you're around I can only ever be second best.  And I'm angry.  My teeth hurt, like Klopp's must.  Fuck you Rotts, fuck your posts.

I feel there are only two options available to me.  I can either retire from the game, or I can hunt you down and kill you.  I will be the Baby Reindeer of the forum.  Uh, no that's not right, Baby Reindeer was the hunted.  I'll be that fat bird.  

Thanks for the feedback mate, I don't know whether to be chuffed or to improve my home security. We do have a Ring doorbell but that's only useful for seeing what time of the early hours the kids got in from a night out, and whether they had a member of the opposite sex with them. Not that that would be a problem of course. It's just that my wife is really nosy. The kids, complaining about the invasion of their privacy and inspired by the ULEZ protestors, are openly discussing vandalising the doorbell.

You are being hard on yourself, of course. Your poem the other day made me laugh out loud, involuntarily. This happens quite a lot, with posts from yourself and others. I sometimes feel bad afterwards for not acknowledging how funny they were.

And anyway, I have to thank Klopp. He is my inspiration, there's just so much material to work with, particularly on the psychological side. In that respect, it's only just occurred to me that I'll genuinely miss him. A bit.

Well that was weird.

A solid performance in a game that proved meaningless, but a bizarre decision by the ref to give a winning goal that was clearly handball, even after he’d seen it on the VAR screen. Did he feel sorry for Arsenal or something.

Nothing will be made of it, but he shouldn’t be allowed to ref a game for a while.

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:

SEFTON wrote:

Rotterdam 1985 wrote:

Tonteau wrote:I reckon the hammers will surprise Man City and beat them to nil but with the title wide open before them, Arsenal will crumble in the face of Dyche’s mighty Toffees. In the bitter inquest that follows in north London, the blame will be pointed at one man, and one man only: SEFTON. A man on such a hot streak that the toffees literally cannot lose when he’s at the helm. We need him on the match thread through the whole of preseason and from game one next season, I’ll be getting my £10 on the toffees doing a Leicester.

Sef's run of form is the one thing that makes me think this day won't go the way people think. He's been unstoppable.

Next season we need Sef on every game. If he claims that "work is getting in the way of me posting on here" then I'm finding out where he works and phoning them to tell them he's had his hands in the till. And also strangles kittens for fun. He'll get sacked, which may cause him a bit of personal disappointment but I'm thinking bigger picture here.

Haha I work at Heathrow mate and I have two cats so killing eve won’t help either as miss Coma is an Evertonian anyways I mentioned on here I just wanted premiership survival and a decent takeover! So far we are on course hoping MSP take us over for a season is what I have heard ,at least would stave off from administration.going to try make a promise not to finish bottom of the the predictions league next season .

Here’s to us getting something out of Sundays game at the Emirates.UTFTs 

Heathrow? OK, thanks mate. And about your line manager, do you have any amusing nicknames for him that you could share here? Or real names even? Does he have one of those amusing real names like Phil McCavity or John Dungheap? If so, do you have a direct line telephone number for him so that I can call him up and say his name and then laugh?

Final question - one of my lad's mates is interested in getting into your line of work and would like to speak to HR about any potential openings. Can you give me the number for your HR department please? No not the general HR team but the HR team that specifically deals with your area Sef. Just so that I can avoid having to go through that awful call routing system they're bound to have. You know what I mean - "for payroll enquiries, press 1; for kitten abuse, press 2; for health and wellbeing support, press 3" etc. Thanks mate, appreciate it.

Hi mate, we have many line managers so can’t give you anything specific plus it would also be a breech of data security,what I will say is your lads mate could apply on line too Heathrow.com would have to clear anti terrorism interview and about four other interviews over a six month period. Hope he gets in.

hairy cataract wrote:Well that was weird.

A solid performance in a game that proved meaningless, but a bizarre decision by the ref to give a winning goal that was clearly handball, even after he’d seen it on the VAR screen. Did he feel sorry for Arsenal or something.

Nothing will be made of it, but he shouldn’t be allowed to ref a game for a while.

We got cheated today by the premier league who couldn’t relegate us,Michael Oliver deserves a Cnut of the year award .

"Good evening, and welcome to Philosophy Today. In today's episode we'll be asking, 'what is handball?'"

just back from work & watched the highlights.... that IS handball !...

btw the pass by Ashley Young for it was fucking terrible... and to think we have offered that twat another year !

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:just back from work & watched the highlights.... that IS handball !...

btw the pass by Ashley Young for it was fucking terrible... and to think we have offered that twat another year !

Agree x 2, terrible pass. But I really start to think it's a case of having ANYBODY that's free (apart from their overinflated wages, of course).

Amazing that VAR actually confirmed it to be a goal. Jesus clearly used the arm to direct the ball towards the Everton goal. Nuts.

Just saw this on the BBC.

Arsenal did find the winner, however, although it came in controversial circumstances.

After Havertz tucked the ball in from close range, the video assistant referee recommended that the goal should be disallowed for a Gabriel Jesus handball in the build-up.

But after reviewing the footage at the side of the pitch, referee Michael Oliver allowed the goal.

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:just back from work & watched the highlights.... that IS handball !...

btw the pass by Ashley Young for it was fucking terrible... and to think we have offered that twat another year !

Agree x 2, terrible pass. But I really start to think it's a case of having ANYBODY that's free (apart from their overinflated wages, of course).

Amazing that VAR actually confirmed it to be a goal. Jesus clearly used the arm to direct the ball towards the Everton goal. Nuts.

Sadly, I think that's where we are at. Although both Young and Coleman are probably at the point of retirement, we will keep them on because we can;t afford to replace them. It's a dangerous game, but we have no choice because we have no money at all, are still likely to get another points deduction for historical overspend, are building a new stadium, and are in danger of collapsing into administration with no new ownership on the horizon.

Dyche and Thelwell have as good as confirmed that we will be a selling club this summer, and that we will be relying on loans and frees. The view seems to be we might as well keep someone like Young because at least he's fit for his age.

As for the wages, I saw an Irish interview with Seamus after the match and the interviewer joked about Seamus not saying too much because it might weaken his negotiations. Seamus slapped him down, saying there was no negotiation between him and Everton, he loved the club and it was just whether he was able to do another year at the required level. So he is clearly going to accept low wages, as probably is Young. There will be no high wages offered to anyone next season.

hairy cataract wrote:

Knight of Thorgothshire wrote:

Made 4 Gwladys wrote:just back from work & watched the highlights.... that IS handball !...

btw the pass by Ashley Young for it was fucking terrible... and to think we have offered that twat another year !

Agree x 2, terrible pass. But I really start to think it's a case of having ANYBODY that's free (apart from their overinflated wages, of course).

Amazing that VAR actually confirmed it to be a goal. Jesus clearly used the arm to direct the ball towards the Everton goal. Nuts.

Sadly, I think that's where we are at.  Although both Young and Coleman are probably at the point of retirement, we will keep them on because we can;t afford to replace them.  It's a dangerous game, but we have no choice because we have no money at all, are still likely to get another points deduction for historical overspend, are building a new stadium, and are in danger of collapsing into administration with no new ownership on the horizon.

Dyche and Thelwell have as good as confirmed that we will be a selling club this summer, and that we will be relying on loans and frees.  The view seems to be we might as well keep someone like Young because at least he's fit for his age.

As for the wages, I saw an Irish interview with Seamus after the match and the interviewer joked about Seamus not saying too much because it might weaken his negotiations.  Seamus slapped him down, saying there was no negotiation between him and Everton, he loved the club and it was just whether he was able to do another year at the required level.  So he is clearly going to accept low wages, as probably is Young.  There will be no high wages offered to anyone next season.

We have to work the loan market well this summer. Get some players in who will (unlike Danjuma) do the job that Dyche wants them to do. We were good at loans in the Bobby days. Could make a big difference on the cheap.

Back to the match for a second.... that handball. The best comment I've seen about it was that Oliver's weird over-ruling of VAR was triggered by the clubs deciding to have a vote on whether VAR should be scrapped. Kind of makes sense, and sums up our season. The government threatens the PL to get its house in order, and the PL shows their strength by imposing unprecedented points deductions on Everton. The clubs threaten to bin VAR, and the PL tells refs that they should think about over-ruling VAR for a change, and that's exactly what Oliver does - against Everton.

I think we're unfortunate to be at the wrong end of both of these decisions, but luckily we survived them.